Wednesday, May 8

{{ blog every day in may }} day eight

to be honest i am not at all proud of the tale i am about to tell of how my very first job was not a great success..

i was fifteen and honestly believed that my friends, drinking, and dancing to soul to soul was the *only* thing that mattered in life..
in order to fund my habit and continued slippery slope in to drunken stupidness i found myself a job. yup - i managed to disguise the enormous bags under my eyes and wonky walk from just too much dancing and convince a lovely lady to employ me...

how i did this i do not remember as a great chunk of my teenage years seems to be missing from my memory - i blame that entirely on malibu...

the job was in my local town of tunbridge wells for a company called roseby's..
they sold curtains and hand towels i think.. curtains for sure, the rest is a bit blurry..
anyhoo, the nice lady thought that as a complete beginner in the world of curtains that i should start at the easy end of things..
in other words she shoved me downstairs with the nets...

my task was to convince folk that net curtains were a great idea, assist them with choosing a design and then cutting desired length from the large rolls..
easy peasy lemon squeezy
it was a breeze and i had a good few weeks under my belt before i knew it, how fast time passed when surrounded by netting...

however questions were soon asked when it came round to stock taking...
seemingly i had been a tad generous in my cutting allowance and had merrily been giving away a little bit too extra ...
i was forgiven and just had to complete a training day on the difference between 5cm and half a meter...

and then the pernod and black night happened...
again its all a tad on the blurry side but i woke up the next morning on my parents doorstep with no shoes and very little dignity but i made it to work as i am nothing if not a blooming trooper...

that day at work was torture and i swear i only laid on the cutting table for one minute, just closed my eyes briefly for a power nap, and that i had no intention of dribbling all over a pile of nets that i had seemingly fashioned in to a pillow...

needless to say that after prodding me with a wooden ruler and removing the net that was stuck to the side of my face with drool the lovely lady guided me towards the main door and asked me to never return...

and this dear readers is why net curtains are not welcome in my home :)


  1. Hahahahahahahaha. This is brilliant. It's very Tumbridge Wells of you, to work in a net curtain shop :)

  2. Oh Tracy, that's so funny! I used to work on a net curtain stall in the market ... Not very glamorous is it?

    I don't like nets either, just the lovely Ikea fake vintage lace ones!

    Love Claire xx

    1. ohhh yes i like the ikea lace curtain - think i have a couple of sets somewhere :)

  3. Love this. My first jobs was also in soft furnishings, but I'm sad to say I had less of a rock and roll lifestyle!

  4. Tee Hee you do make ne laugh.:)
    Soul ll Soul are touring at the mo according to breakfast telly.B-)

  5. I am laughing out loud!! so funny... I also lost a hole weekend on Maliboo... can't even spell it!! me and Lee Cooper who was my next door neighbour, bar one...staggered home from the pub at the tender age of 15 and snuck in and drunk his dads christmas Mallibu ..still can't spell it!! 2 days later still pucking green stuff....awww...learnt a very valuable lesson that night.. I wonder what happened to lee Cooper...??I hate nets too xx

  6. Omg I love this post so much!! Malibu had a lot to answer for!


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